Okay...nothing happened.

But now I'm back.

Bet you're excited.

"Arrive. Raise Hell. Leave."

"TP Dude. Out to wipe the asses of evil with the pulpy rolls of justice!"

So.

Tomorrow I'll be out of my town.

It might be fun.

Or it might suck.

But hopefully it'll be good.

"It always rains the hardest on the people who deserve the sun."

I don't really know what I deserve.

Today was crap. All of it, pretty much. All of it.

"Pushing his body on and on until everything had been drummed out of his mind."

Quote of the day- Gregor the Overlander by Suzanne Collins.

Today was okay. I yelled at our gym teacher, band class was amazing, as usual, and study hall (advisory) was hilarious.

Of course, I have a test tomorrow that I choose not to study for until the last minute.

Literally.

What the hell, I'm a procrastinator. Sorry.

Right now? I'm planning to read. An amazing book about a serial killer.

Yeah.

And what did I just finish doing?

I just finished drawing a watch on my wrist in permanent marker.

Life is good when you're that nerdy.

Or, well, sometimes. Kind of.

But I'd rather be the nerdy, anti-social, loser, freak that I am, instead of some preppy jock person who's exactly the same as everyone else.

"A little rebellion now and then is a good thing."

Quote for the day, how about it.

Well, I said I'd try to make things a little bright sometimes.

Because we know I'm just a ray of freaking sunshine.

But, hey.

I'll do my best.

Earlier this morning there was a huge thunderstorm.

I find beauty in that.

The lightning, the thunder, the sounds, the rain.

It's all pretty amazing.

But what's really cool?

How an hour later it's warm as heck, not raining at all, and the sun is out.

Makes me believe there are some things out there that go from bad to good.

And then good to better.

So, happy enough?

I could probably draw a picture of rainbows and unicorns, but who am I kidding.

We all know I'd rather draw a pegasus with a cyclops on it's back, carrying a javelin, ready to spear the sorry soul that got in his way, flying under a beautiful storm, like the one that occured this morning.

So I COULD draw the picture of rainbows.

But I choose not to.

Honestly?

I'm not that bad.

I don't complain all the time, I'm not always ticked, I'm not depressed.

But it seems as if I'm making myself sound that way.

I just planned to get all of my hate out here.

I guess I can let good things run through these fingertips, too.

Sometimes.

People are stupid.

It's a given.

People are annoying.

It's managable.

People are mean.

And it's making me angry.

Every. Freaking. Day. Something. Happens.

Maybe it's small.

Maybe someone will just move my stuff from a desk so they can sit there.

That's not that bad.

But it'll still get me ticked.

Why?

Because I'm tired.

Not physically tired, just tired of people.

And so now those small little mean things make me pissed.

And I'm starting to react instead of just letting them do it.

-earlier today-

These group of girls run into me in the hallways.

"Oh, thanks for, you know, running into me," I say, loud enough for them to hear, a sarcastic and angry tone in my voice.

The one girl just turns around, a smile playing on her face, her peppy ponytail bobbing.

"You're welcome," she tells me cheerfully, making fun of me.

I scoff and walk away, shaking my head.

-back to present-

It just upsets me.

To put it in nice terms.

It bugs the f*cking sh!t out of me.

But, hey. I'm slowly cracking.

I'll stand up and say something back someday.

I need to talk.

I mean, I really need to talk.

Out loud.

To people.

Don't mind it.

You try to walk forward, but instead you go down, hitting the pavement hard, making cracks, scars.

You didn't even know you could fall that hard.

You try getting back up.

It works.

And then.

Someone trips you.

You're down again.

Hitting harder, you're further down.

You're bleeding.

Bones broken, body aches.

It doesn't look like you'll see the sun again.

It seems like you'll be facing that ground the rest of your time.

And then.

You're on your hands and knees. You want to reach the top again.

You need to reach the top again.

Wincing, closing your eyes, you start looking up.

Seeing the stars. It's night.

It's beautiful.

And so you're off of your hands, and only on your knees, breathing hard, but breathing.

In. And out.

Almost give up. It's so tiring.

But you don't.

Because you know you don't want to.

You know you've got to keep moving towards the top.

You squeeze your eyes shut, clench your fist, and grit your teeth.

You WILL make it.

And eventually, you do.

Hands still clenched, body aching.

But it is worth it.

After all, you're staring up at the night sky, the wind in your face.

The stars in view.

You don't need a figure to bow down to.

You got up on your own.

And now you're walking over the cracks in the pavement, the puddle of blood, and you're moving forward.

A smile on your face.